ENCOURAGEMENT NOT TO GET STUCK IN OFFENSE

Have you ever experienced an offense at the hands of your Christian brothers or sisters? Unfortunately, being offended happens at one point or another in our walk. It doesn't make you a bad Christian to be hurt or offended. But when it does happen, we have a choice to turn it into a journey and move on or we can clutch tightly, holding on to our offense and find ourselves stuck.

OUR ENEMY IS EVIL

The devil is sly. You might think you're not easily offended and always try to do your best to keep your focus on Jesus. But when you feel slighted or offended, again and again, it becomes hard sometimes to keep your focus where it needs to be. It might feel like the offense has taken on a life of its own and has snowballed out of control. We’ve all been there.

Sometimes offense is simply a misunderstanding and if the other person knew how hurt you were they would be pretty upset to have caused it.

Sometimes someone will strike out, deliberately hurting you when it has nothing to do with you but something personal this person is dealing with.

But Satan doesn’t care about the reason for the offense. He just rejoices that there is discontent among the brethren. He will take an innocent remark or action and whisper so many lies in your ears, convincing you there was ill intent involved. If you don’t recognize his tactics for what they are, you might find yourself beginning to doubt yourself, your circumstances, and sometimes even God's will in your life.

NOW, WHAT?

So now you've got a problem. You need to handle the situation in a godly way if you want to put it past you and move forward.

But how?

The best possible thing you can do is to stay quiet about the offense and hurt feelings and take it to God in prayer. I realize that is not always easy. But we have to trust God to deal with it his way, in His timing.

And things will change. God will either change you, the other person, or the entire situation. But if you give it to God and pray about it, things will not stay the same.

IT WON'T BE EASY TO MOVE ON

While you are standing firm, patiently waiting for God to deal with the situation, do your best to be a blessing to the other person or situation. Keep reminding yourself that the turmoil you are experiencing is the devil making a small matter into a big deal. And small matters really don't matter.

Why? Because those small things are only scenery in your life and scenery changes every day, moment by moment. That's why life is a journey. We have to keep moving forward. If we stop and rest in the offense, it would become a big deal again stalling our growth. And God doesn’t want us stuck.

HURT? THINK ABOUT THESE THINGS INSTEAD

God won't make you move forward. The difficult situation you find yourself in is either a journey or a resting place but it is your choice. You have to be patient and hold steadfast while God does his mighty work. Otherwise, you let the small offense, and ultimately Satan, control you. It won't be easy to go against your flesh and give it to God but you CAN do it by applying Philippians to your situation.

"In nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus.
Finally, brothers, whatever things are true, whatever things are honorable, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report: if there is any virtue, and if there is any praise, think about these things." (Philippians 4:6-8 )

God says to think about these things: what is pure, lovely, admirable, true, honorable, right, excellent, and worthy of praise. You may feel what you have experienced was none of those things but God doesn't want you to focus on that negative stuff.

Find something about the situation that is pure, lovely, admirable, true, honorable, right, excellent, or worthy of praise. It might be hard but God will help you dig deep. Soon, along with God’s peace, you will notice little sparks of faith that God is working the situation out the way it was meant to be.

"The things which you learned, received, heard, and saw in me: do these things, and the God of peace will be with you."
(Philippians 4:9)

THE BATTLE BELONGS TO THE LORD

The offense or rejection you feel is very real. But when you try to handle it on your own (in the flesh) something will always happen to convince you that you were justified in how you felt. That is Satan messing with your head again.

But believing you're justified doesn't make things better. Only God can make it better because ultimately it is a spiritual battle that belongs to the Lord. When you allow Him to handle it as He sees fit, you may discover that God intends to grow you both through this situation. Regardless of what Satan is up to in the flesh, God is always fighting for us in the spiritual realm.

"And he said, Hearken ye, all Judah, and ye inhabitants of Jerusalem, and thou king Jehoshaphat, Thus saith the Lord unto you, Be not afraid nor dismayed by reason of this great multitude; for the battle is not yours, but God's."
(2 Chronicles 20:15)
"Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them. For the Lord thy God, he it is that doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee."
(Deuteronomy 31:6)

FINAL THOUGHTS

With every offense comes a choice on our part. We can allow it to propel us forward in our spiritual growth or we can get so consumed with it that we become stagnant and stuck.

Whatever decision you make, be patient with yourself. Accept that offense happens. It doesn’t make you a bad Christian or a bad person for feeling offended or even having trouble dealing with things. It’s okay to acknowledge the situation as long as you don’t give it undue attention.

Trust that God will take care of things. Have confidence that He will continue to work in you so that you might be better prepared for the next battle (offense). Because there WILL be another battle. And another one after that until Jesus calls us home.